Perhaps the most indicative â€“ and hilarious â€“ words to ever leave a judgeâ€™s lips occurred in a New Mexico courtroom on Tuesday, October 27th.
They, among other equally notable words, came during the sentencing phase of the case against 20-year-old Isaiah Gay by Bernalillo County District Court Judge Christina Argyres.
Mr. Gay was being sentenced for a string of burglaries heâ€™d committed, when the judge asked him what he thought would happen to him in prison. He guessed beatings. She saw things a bit differently.
“Youâ€™d probably be raped every day, number one,” she said. “Youâ€™d be beat up every other day.”
Upon hearing this harsh reality, he promised heâ€™d never, ever commit another crime. â€œI was being young and dumb,â€ he said of his crimes.
She said prison would be a justifiable sentence, adding, â€œThe issue with residential burglary, again, it’s almost like a rape, because it is such an invasion and such an intrusion on somebody’s life and their property.â€
The Honorable Argyres then said that she didnâ€™t want him to suffer that experience. She sentenced him to five years of probation instead. Heâ€™ll also have to pay restitution for the items he stole.
“He’s going to be somebody’s â€” I hate to use the word ‘bitch,’ but that’s exactly what he’s going to be, and I don’t want to destroy Mr. Gay’s life,” she reiterated.
She did, however, tell him that if he messed up at any point during said probation, heâ€™d be headed straight to jail.