Funny

A Florida man who was hoping to get his drug dealer arrested has found himself behind bars instead.

That’s because Douglas Peter Kelly, 49, was convinced his methamphetamine was bad – and took it to the police station to prove it.

Kelly, of Hawthorne, called the Putnam County Sheriff’s Office on Tuesday to report that he had suffered a ‘bad reaction’ to some meth he purchased the week before.

A Florida man who was hoping to get his drug dealer arrested has found himself behind bars instead.

That’s because Douglas Peter Kelly, 49, was convinced his methamphetamine was bad – and took it to the police station to prove it.

Kelly, of Hawthorne, called the Putnam County Sheriff’s Office on Tuesday to report that he had suffered a ‘bad reaction’ to some meth he purchased the week before.

Kelly drove to the station and turned in a ‘clear, crystal-like substance wrapped in aluminum foil’, according to police.

The substance tested positive for methamphetamine, and Kelly was taken into custody.

Kelly has been charged with possession of methamphetamine and was taken to the Puntam County Jail, where he is being held on $5,000 bond.

MELBOURNE, Fla. — Authorities say a Florida man was returned to jail shortly after his release because he couldn’t pay the taxi driver that took him home from the jail.

Florida Today reports that 40-year-old Charles Folk was arrested Thursday morning and charged with petty theft.

Melbourne police say Folk hailed a taxi outside the Brevard County Jail Complex in Cocoa shortly after midnight. After traveling 30 miles (50 kilometers) to his Melbourne home, Folk told the driver that neither his sister nor his roommate could help him pay the $70 fare. The driver called the police.

Folk had previously been in jail for criminal mischief. Officials say he had been convicted of ransacking his own home and damaging his roommate’s belongings.

Folk was being held on $2,000 bail. Jail records didn’t list an attorney.

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Journalist Sabrina Quagliozzi shot video of the perplexing incident, which occurred on Thursday morning on westbound Route 3 in East Rutherford, near the Meadowlands sports complex. Journalist Sabrina Quagliozzi shot video of the perplexing incident, which occurred on Thursday morning on westbound Route 3 in East Rutherford, near the Meadowlands sports complex. ‘Motorists exited vehicles attempting to remove cash’ causing several multi-vehicle crashes, the department said in a statement.

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Here is a textbook definition of a beer run. This beer baron swiped 5 cases from a convenience store in the 5000 block of Little School Road and took off. He left in a Gray Dodge truck. 📞 Det. Thompson if you recognize him, 817-459-6054 or email, [email protected]

ARLINGTON, Texas – Police are looking for a beer baron who stole several cases of beer from a convenience store.

Arlington PD tweeted pictures Wednesday of the man who stole five cases of Bud Light from a store in the 5000 block of Little School Road.

Police say the suspect got away in a gray Dodge truck.

A Canadian man found another use for his bong after using it to fend off four thieves who were attempting to rob a cannabis dispensary. The masked individuals, who entered the store while brandishing canisters of bear spray, were met with great resistance by the store clerk. The store clerk managed to successfully fight the suspects off with a bong and force them out of the store.

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A suspect has been identified as the suspect in connection with a crime in Lancaster, Pennsylvania, thanks in part to the help of a simple, hand-drawn sketch provided by a witness. A criminal complaint has been filed against Hung Phuoc Nguyen, 44, charging him with two counts of theft by unlawful taking.

‘While the sketch provided by the witness may have appeared amateurish and cartoonish, it, along with the distinctive physical descriptors, jogged the memory of at least one investigator to provide a potential suspect name.

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An unlicensed Florida masseuse has caused a massage parlor to be one employee short after an undercover vice sting collared her for allegedly offering to use her hand to “masturbate the detective” for an additional $60.

70-year-old Sun Hee Gribat was arrested on January 13th at Jax Therapy in Jacksonville when cops started looking into the business following reports that female employees performed sex acts on their customers.

An undercover detective paid Ms. Gribat $70 for a 30-minute rubdown. During the massage, the cops say, she “offered to masturbate the detective for additional $60.00.”

She was taken into custody for prostitution, as well as for unlicensed practice of a health care profession.

She was released after spending a day in jail when she posted her bond.

She’d been arrested in 2014 on a prostitution charge as well. 67 at the time, she was working at another massage parlor when she’d offered to help out another undercover cop in the same manner. She was given a one-year deferred prosecution sentence after taking a plea deal in that case.

 

A north Carolina man kicked the door in to a stranger’s apartment on December 26th. His mistake, however, makes for one hell of a memorable mugshot.

27-year-old Matthew Lawrence Bergstedt met face-to-face with the shocked resident’s firewood.

That resident beat him over the head, giving him the injuries you see above.

After the beating, he staggered away and broke into another (but vacant) apartment close by.

He was charged with breaking and entering and attempted breaking and entering.

 

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inout1

An Arizona man made a bizarre choice during a police chase Wednesday night, where he was the suspect in an aggravated domestic violence case; he stopped by an In-N-Out Burger’s drive-thru.

35-year-old Joshua Adkins appeared to order food, but then drove away without picking it up and got out of his truck a short time later. He then ran into a backyard and tried to get into a house through a back door.

When he couldn’t get in, he surrendered to police and was taken into custody.

He was charged with unlawful flight from law enforcement, aggravated assault-domestic violence, and unlawful imprisonment.

 

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naked1

A Tennessee man wearing nothing but a smile and carrying an unopened can of Coors Light was arrested at about 3:30 a.m. Friday after numerous 911 calls reporting a naked white male pounding on windows and doors.

27-year-old Joshua Ivy was discovered “completely naked and appeared extremely intoxicated” when officers arrived on the scene. When asked how much alcohol he’d consumed, through extremely slurred speech, he responded that he couldn’t remember.

He couldn’t even remember how he’d gotten where he was.

When asked about the pounding on windows and doors, he didn’t hesitate; he was looking for someone to have sex with.

He was arrested for misdemeanor disorderly intoxication and spent roughly five hours in custody before posting a $1000 bond.